Understanding your toddler's development needs during Covid Crisis

I was speaking with a couple of friends the other day. They have a 3 year old who does his preschool classes online, and had some concerns.

1. The activities in the classes seem too rushed - each activity was only 5-7 minutes in duration
2. Their child wasn't doing the writing activities in class and they couldn't get him to do it even otherwise, which was leading them to lose patience at times
3. Due to juggling household and professional commitments they were not able to spend time with their child, and when they were with him, they were trying to get him to do the classroom activities
4. Their child was getting cranky at times

Understanding a child's perspective

Impact of the Pandemic and lockdown

The pandemic hasn't been easy on any of us. As adults we are able to rationalize a lot of things. The children are not. A toddler under 4 years of age is probably unable to articulate what they are feeling. It is up to us as adults to understand what they are going through

1. Most kids were either going to a creche or preschool, or meeting friends at home before the pandemic had struck. In most cases, this has now stopped or drastically reduced

2. At this age, children have socialization needs which are not getting met now

3. Children also have a lot of energy in their little bodies, at least part of which needs to be let go of with physical activities. at preschool, daycare, in parks, this need was met by playing with other kids. Now the responsibility of that falls on the parents. At times, this aspect is getting neglected

A general perspective

4. Every experience for a toddler is learning - this includes not just your ABCs but also play based activities where they learn life concepts by experiencing them

5. For most activities, a toddler's attention is not more than 10 minutes

The Role of an Online Preschool

Preschools, though physically shut, come with years of experience, which they are now integrating in online modules. 

As a parent, these are certain aspects you need to now focus on when understanding both your child's behaviour as well as the role that their preschool or school is now playing through their online classes. Every aspect mentioned above is getting incorporated in the online sessions, where as parents you are now equal partners.

1. While as a parent you may feel activities are rushed, they need to be so since children lose attention after that

2. There are many types of activities planned in a day or week, so every child finds something they like

3. Learning isn't just restricted to ABCs or 123s, it needs to be more holistic to look at the overall development of a child under 4. You are looking at motor skill development, right brain development, hand eye coordination, life skills, sensory development and so many more. The schools are incorporating all these in their programs

4. In a limited manner, online preschools are still providing the platform that children need for social development - the kids are interacting with an educator, and interacting with peers

5. The educator is someone who is able to observe and interact with your child while remaining objective. Done right, this is one of the reasons why you sometimes feel your child listening to their teacher. This role continues even during the pandemic - this is feedback we get from most parents we speak with.

Your Role as a Parent

Your situation is undoubtedly very difficult. That support you had in child care is now missing - a creche, preschool, your child's friends in the park. These all formed a part of your support system even if it was only for an hour of the day. However, it's time to make the best of this situation in the interest of your child

1. Stop thinking like an adult for a moment. Try to step into your toddler's shoes and then understand their needs

2. Take the activities which your child's school is exposing you to and take them further during the rest of the day. But remember to do those activities with your toddler instead of trying to teach them to do it like a teacher

3. Set aside exclusive mamma-baby or papa-baby time each day to do activities which your child wants to do. If there's a specific learning activity you would like to do with them, make it fun

4. Make it a point to give your child the space to run around and do physical activities, do it with them like a friend

5. At this point, more than conventional learning outcomes, happiness is more important. If your child is happy, the learning outcomes will happen, they may just take a few months extra

6. Your household is full of stuff you can use to play as well as ensure learning and development

Most important, remember to be patient.